pneumatic

It is impossible to shut out the noise of the drilling that is going on at the void deck of the opposite block. I've tried everything from closing all the windows, plugging in my earphones, playing my cello (but I can't even hear myself..), even blanking out my mind to attempt to reach some higher consciousness (kidding) but nothing works. It doesn't even fade into background noise, contrary to popular belief that if you hear something for long enough you don't notice it's there.

Some upgrading project. They painted the opposite block Piglet Pink and Sky Blue. The natural blue of the sky is fine, but when painted on something, it just looks sick. I have no doubt that in a few days time the same fate will befall my block. What's wrong with the original orange and green anyway?

This is heartlander-talk.

random musings

Watched 'Chinatown' in Film and History Lecture today, and saw a thug stick a knife up Jack Nicholson's nose and slit it in one clean upward stroke. Pretty much like opening a letter with a letter opener.

If it hurts everytime you breathe, will it remind you of the cost of living?

in the space between boredom and sleep

I was clearing out my sms inbox on the bus when I realised the number of hit-and-run smses I have. "Hit-and-run" smses, (you can say you saw it here first, but I wonder if any other morbid person has stumbled upon the idea already) are those that have some goodnight/friendship message or a not-very-funny joke mass mailed by people. Sometimes these come from people you know, sometimes from others whom you haven't heard from in years. So they hit you with the smses, and they wait for your reply. And when you don't, you'll never hear from those you never hear from until a few years after when they send you another hit-and-run sms again. I suppose it isn't a very good analogy, or rather, my brain is stretching the very tenous connection between the two. For one, hit-and-run drivers never wait to see if the victim is dead or alive (while sms-ers do wait for your response? well, maybe they don't as much wait as leave their phone on...) I did say the link was tenuous!

This is the by-product of locking myself up in a room with nothing but my laptop and a bottle of water and a pile of notes/books (4 hour sessions for 3 days already..) in an attempt to finish my term papers. I've finished two out of four, and all that has achieved is to make me a little bit mad, and helped me discover the inner prisoner in mye. I realised that being in enclosed in small spaces with high ceilings is really therapeutic. You know that even if you were to explode, the highest your brain will reach is the ceiling, and you won't...never mind.

On the bus, the man beside you pours lavender oil on his hands.

motivation

This is going to be a depressed, senseless rant. Skip it if you wish. The next post might be happier.

Hopped over to the act3 office today to pass them the photos for 'Emperor's New Clothes", and Chandran asked me if I was free to act for their next school tour. Unfortunately most of the shows are not on my free days, and so even though they only have 10 shows I can't do it! And if that wasn't depressing enough I found out that the company's KL tour starts on the 15th but I'll still be stuck playing for SDT's Sleeping Beauty so I can't go either; and it is also 'Sleeping Beauty's fault that I can't play for Singapore Idol too! Bah.

So I was moping in the office and listening to them talk about the upcoming shows, all the while sinking deeper and deeper into the huge roller chair and just I was about to be engulfed by the musty smell of mothballs and cigarette smoke, Chandran asked, "Why do you have to go to school anyway? Can you just not go? What's the point?"

Me: "For the paper!"

C: "It's not like you can eat the paper!"

Which is true. Perhaps this sense of frustration with university stems from me feeling that it's holding me back from the rest of the world, somehow. There seems to be so many more things to do, apart from going to school. Rushing term papers and mugging for tests seem so pointless. I don't think I'm saying this just because I have 4 major term papers to do and the prospect seems so tiringly daunting. Maybe it's what I've felt all along, except that the A's was quite a whirlwind and I never actually had the time to think about what I was doing. Or maybe it's because act3's such a wonderful place I feel I can keep doing this for the rest of my sorry life. Maybe it's something I'll get over eventually, but I can't help wondering what's my motivation for going to school? I know it seems like a really 'Duh' question considering the answer is obvious - get a good education to get a good job blah blah. Maybe I'm just being myopic and immature. I don't really know though.

It's not that university is not fun or anything. This whole knowledge acquisition thing is rather interesting. Everyday you gather little nuggets of information (which you might or might not want to know) which you hoard in your brain until you have exams, eject it all out during exams in a sparkling display of brilliance, and then you select another 5 modules, and repeat the process ad infinitum ad nauseum. Basically what we've been doing for most of our lives. I'm really tired.

(And I can hear the whispers "It's only the 8th week of the term and she's already burnt out? tsk tsk..")

I don't think I'm burnt out; I just lack motivation. Stanislavki's much acclaimed idea of 'objective'.

I meandered throught the library and didn't have it in me to pick up any book. Instead, I eavesdropped on loud whispers and found this:

(Boy picks up a book on CISCO security networks)
Girl: "Whoah, if you hack into their network, means you are more genius than their genius la, then you can conquer Singapore already!" *breaks into high pitched giggles*

Anyone's mind in gear-whirring mode yet?

Happy together

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Originally uploaded by Disturbia.

Chandran and Amy! (colour coordinated...)

the quiet game!

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Originally uploaded by Disturbia.

Eenie, Meanie, Mo! (in an anticlockwise direction from right)

The Quiet Game is a game originally intended to keep them from 'heeling' around before the show, but in the words of Mo (Annalea),
"It's for us to chill"

"i just want to sleep"

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Originally uploaded by Disturbia.

Clickand ye shall find...more photos!

woogie

2nd day - we rock our shorts off! A turbulent and tiring day. Meanie and Minie got into a fight today, over a silly pushing incident.

Minie shrieks: "I never!"
and later,even though she was the one who pushed her brother, "I refuse to sit any where close to (Meanie)!"
after which she sits in a corner of the already tiny dressing room and pouts and refuses to take part in any of the games or the photo-taking.

Later, Mo sidles up to me and whispers, "Just now (Minie) almost didn't go onstage because she was crying"
[and i think to myself, hah, that explains why her lipstick is all over her hands and face and costume..]
then Chandran comes rushing in and goes "where's (Minie)?"
"In the toilet"
[she emerged with more lipstick smudged over her face, her vest unbuttoned and her cap off]
sigh.

While Minie pouts in the corner because her socks are wrong and too long (she thinks), "I'm not going to wear my socks anymore!" and sits sockless and shoeless, the rest are fooling around posing for the camera.

At night, when we're passing through the dressing rooms of the Mamma Mia cast, we stop to look at the screen which shows what is going on the the theatre. 3 people are dancing onstage singing Abba's Dancing Queen. Eenie Meanie Minie Mo stare at the screen for a long time. Minie starts singing along.
Meanie, "They aren't really singing!"
Minie shrieks, "Yes they are! I saw this in London!"
Mo squeaks:" All they do is move their hands about! We have to do more for our final dance"
Meanie: "Yeah! I bet we can do this ten times better than them!"
They all nod silently and continue watching the screen for a long time.

boogie

First day of "The Emperor's New Clothes" by act3 theatrics! It feels strange because for once it's not me having to worry about the quick costume changes and the wig that refuses to stay on and the eyeliner getting into my eyes. I have, instead, the most un-job like jobs -- that of babysitting the child actors. Basically I put on their makeup, make sure they don't forget to bring their props, bring them around the esplanade when they want to go to the chocolate shop, and make sure they don't get lost, don't run and fall, don't lick off the lipstick, don't spill milo over their costumes etc. It's really really fun and funny. Below are excerpts from today's classic moments. To protect their identity, they shall be known by their stage names: eenie, meenie, minie, mo. Respective ages, 9, 10, 8, 7.

When putting on makeup:
Minie (who can never keep her lips still and thus gets lipstick all over her chin): "Why can't we have Hilary Duff lipstick? It's my favourite lipstick"
(blur look) "Hilary Duff lipstick?"
"Yes yes it's good to eat, I lick it all off after I put it on!"
"..... ....."

With the exception of Meenie who is a boy, their favourite movie is "A Cinderella Story" by guess who? Hilary Duff.

What goes on between shows when they get a break and I bring them out and they step into the huge lift:
(all dashing around from corner to corner haphazardly not unlike the motion of air molecules)
(screaming)
"You're IT! you're IT!"
And the lift doors open to an awesomely quiet backstage of the spiky place's theatre where the Mamma Mia cast hang out. They have one dressing room per person. And they have signs to show the cast around to the rehearsal room in case they get lost. Example of a sign would be
"Yes this is the lift!" next to the lift buttons.
Wow.

Mo (who incidentally reminds me a lot of Po of Teletubbies) is writing a book called "The Three Friends". about a purple string, a blue string, and a red string.

When I take orders for food:
Eenie: "I want a cheeseburger without pickles"
and today "I want a fish burger because I'm Catholic and we're not supposed to eat meat on Fridays"
Meenie: " I want McCrispy and if they don't have that I want McWings and if not I'll have McNuggets"
Minie: McNuggets! (for 2 days in a row already)
Mo: "I want Cheese Fries"
Eenie: "Yes I want Cheese Fries too!"
Me: "Cheese Fries can only be found at KFC and we're going to Mcdonalds.."
Meenie: "My mum says KFC is the worst fast food and we can only eat it 4 times a year..wait i think now it's less times" (despairing look)

When they've found out about the ugly truth of the world - that people smoke. *collective gasp* (Eenie and Mo are siblings, so is Meenie and Minie)
(Eenie and Minie whisper in the corner)
Me being the one that's dying to be filled in on the gossip goes "tell me tell me!"
(Minie whispers) "XXX smokes"
Mo, being the young and innocently ignorant one goes: "What what?"
(aside: I've just realised the emergence of teletubbie-speak i.e. repeat every word among our group! like "again, again!"
Minie: "We just found out that XXX had an operation"
Me: "And which part of the body got taken out?"
(general silence as they try to find a namable internal organ which can be taken out without having XXX die.)
Mo, being astute and sensing something amiss: "Don't bluff! tell me tell me!"
She pouts, then promptly forgets having asked the question, and proceeds to continue writing her book.